~just floating along~

today we went to concord
it was soooo much fun
for now on it will be just us
Me, Scottie, Erin, and Brandon
AHHHHHHH!!!!!!
i still can't get over it
i love being with these guys
next up is the beach
YAY
can't wait for tuesday
just the four of us

i heart everyone
especially scottie

you know
you tell me not to be jealous
but the things you do make me jealous
you tell me you had a threesome on top of your roof
or that was where i got head at
or see those dorms i had sex there
and you expect me not to be jealous

you know i like you
and you know i have feelings for you
so why do you tell me these things?
is it to get the reaction that you want?
is it to make me cry when you are not here because of what you said?
you accomplished that one

it just pisses me off
that even though i get mad at you
i stop being mad at you when i see you
you make me happy
and you make me laugh

aren't you supposed to be with the guy
that makes you happy and laugh  all the time
i don't get it
i wish i had total control of my life

so totally had a spinal today
well not me
brittany f. did
i just blew the whistles
nobody heard them
so i look around and there is jeff walking with some girl
(i want to say it was his girlfriend because he was with her all day but whatever)
i pick up my cone and holler at jeff to come here
jeff is like wtf mate?
an i am pointing to my neck and pointing at brittany in a hurried manner
he looks at me and in like a second he had his hip pack off and gave me his cell phone and jumped in endless river to speed island to help brittany
by then scott (our new lead or my minja) got there already
i think the kid was ok
he got up and they took him to first aid

anyway
i got hit on by owen and a few other guards but that is a normal day
god i love being back at raging waters
i didn't have to jump in for a kid today that was good
had fun after work in the parking lot with scotty and erin
good times

so i am heading out my door
to go to school
when my brother says
SOMEONE BROKE YOUR WINDOW
i was so mad
some other cars on my street
got hit too
guess someone got bored
cost $109
ASSHOLES

so today my class got attacked by one single little bee
it was hilarious
i am sitting in class and i hear monica across the room
she is screaming and dives to the floor
the bee is hovering above her
people are swatting at it
this is where the madness ensues
i get up and take hold of my sunny delight bottle
i wanted to chuck it at the bee
but the class was screaming at me to not throw it
i close my math book and take hold of it and i run
i run straight for the bee
all the while mr. gazanka has his squirt bottle trying to squirt it
alexa is outside running back and forth
i'm on top of elija's desk swatting at the bee with my math book
mr. gazanka has the bee up against the ceiling squirting the bee
the bee escapes and is trying to get away

you know how a fly goes a the window
rams into it
trying to get outside
that was what it was doing

mr. gazanka chucks the squirt bottle at the bee
the bottle hits alexa on the arm
elija takes athena's binder from her desk
he starts stalking it like a lion stalks it's pray
then he threw the binder at the bee and squished
there was this huge bug goop mark on the window
it looked like a river of bee gutts
that was an awesome first period

i looked hot today
enough said

hahah
i looked like a sexy little minx

ok so you know how apple bottom jeans are supposed to make your butt look good
well i saw this one girl at school wearing them
and she did not look good in them

1. she did not have a butt
2. they might have been the wrong size
and
3. i should have told her

man people these days thinking they look good in things
do you think she tried them on and said
"i think i will go for the flabby butt look, lets buy a pair"
hahaha yeah

sharks are winning 1-0 in the second period 12 minutes left.

can noses have periods
cuz i think mine had its today
it was like a river was flowing
first it stared to leak
like drip you know
then i was like ok
lifeguard allison to the rescue
i stuck toilet paper up my nose
then i pull it out like 2 minutes later
and then
the dam burst
it was crazy there was blood everywhere
i put my nose over the sink
and when i looked down
the bottom of the sink was covered in blood
i thought i was really hurt
i was like
"DAD CAN YOU COME IN HERE I THINK I AM BLEEDING OUT"
"I 'M GOING TO DIE!!!"
it may sound stupid but that was kind of scary
if you saw all that blood you would have been too
i would have takin pictures
but dad decided to clean it up

i have deemed this year the year of the break-ups and pregnancies
 so many people that i know are breaking up with their boyfriends
or getting pregnent

 it is like junior and senior year is when you have to dump your boyfriend or girlfriend
 haha
 so my math teacher said that he told this girl that a guy [my friend] liked her,
 and she liked him so the girl goes and breaks up with her boyfriend
 to go to junior prom with this guy [my friend] and the funny thing is
 is that my friend isn't going to junior prom so now the girl can't go to junior prom

 my other friends boyfriend broke up with her
 because he said that he wasn't spending enough time with her and that it wasn't fair
 for her to be in a relationship like that, the stupid thing is is that they are both friends
 with the same people and they are always with the same people hanging out

so many of my friends are getting pregnant
 even the ones that i thought would never get pregnant
 cats are included vera
 i would have thought that people would be smart
 that my friends were smart
 not to say that they are stupid
 but that is the way it is coming off
 they were stupid in the way that they weren't thinking about themselves
 and what they were doing but it is there choice not mine
 and i bet they wish that they could go back in time and erase what they did

 i just hope that they can survive this
 and get through life as good as possible

so yeah
my grandpa died on february 23, 2006
we had his memorial yesterday
it was so sad
my uncles told stories of what they remember of him
my dad went up
i knew he was going to cry
he almost made it through untill the end
i don't remember the exact words
it was along the line of someone telling him that he was like his father
and it is true he is like grandpa
and my uncle made this slid show of pictures of gramps
it was so beautiful
it mad me cry
every time i watch it, it is going to make me cry

i feel bad for my grandma
she is all alone at the house
my mom goes down to gilroy to keep her company
but it still has to be hard for her
to wake up every morning and gramps isn't there
and it is going to be hard at thanksgiving and christmas
grandap always ran the show for as long as i can remember
it is goingt to be tuff.

We laughed, we cried 
And all the while we felt so alive 
It was you and me 
You grabbed my hand and made me see 
What it could feel like 
And what it might be like 
You wrote my name in the sand 
In this endless summer 
We will be together 
And i don't want this feeling to ever end 
Looking back in november 
Feel the sun and remember 
That when our time has finally come to pass 
Somethings last 
Somethings always last 
Save goodbye 
Keep it frozen in december 
I need the high 
To get me through the ever after 
Cause now that it feels like 
Its far from what it was like 
When you wrote our names in the sand 
In this endless summer 
We will be together 
And i don't want this feeling to ever end 
Looking back in november 
Feel the sun and remember 
That when our time has finally come to pass 
Somethings last 
Somethings always last 
It's not what it feels like 
Its far from what it was like 
When i wrote our name in the sand 
In this endless summer 
We will be together 
And i don't want this feeling to ever end 
Looking back in november 
Feel the sun and remember 
That when our time has finally come to pass 
Somethings last 
Somethings always last 
Somethings last 
Somethings always last 
We laughed, we cried 
And all the while we felt so alive 
It was you and me

Ashlee Simpson-Endless Summer

my life is not what i want it to be
i want to have some control
but my parents have most of it
everything is going wrong

my grandpa is in the hospital
we saw him today
i hope he gets better
i don't want him to die
i haven't gone fishing with him yet
when he gets out of the hospital that is what i am going to do with him
i am going ot fishing with him

life is all wrong right now
i am supposed to be happy and have a boyfriend who likes me
but i have neither right now
and i don't think i ever will

it has been forever since i have been on here
my computer decided to die on me so i was stuck doing nothing all day every day
not much has gone on
i have been crying a lot lately
mostly because of my mom she is being a bitch
she says that her and dad have given me everything that i want and how do i repay them

by lying

but come on what daughter hasn't lied to there parents
but i feel like the one thing that they can't give me

they are trying to take away from and that hurts

what does it matter if i am 18 or not it will happen eventually
they just need to let me go and grow up
i can't be there little girl forever

anyway i need to find a dress for the lion king play that i am going to
i have an idea where i am going to go get one i just need to find the time to go and get it

you know what annoys the heck out of me?
people who say they are going to call back but they never do
cuz if someone says they will call back you think ok they will call you back that same day
but no they will call back the next day
not this one he called me on saturday and said he would call back and what day is it?
tuesday
what a ho!!!
and yet every day i think he is going to call and i get my hopes up
but he doesn't call
that makes me sad
maybe he found a girlfriend and doesn't have time to talk to me anymore
that would make me really sad and make me cry
i hope he didn't
that would suck

i need to get my freakin license
jessica is so not going to get her license before me
that would piss me off so much
my mom needs to freakin call so i can go
but i know what she is going to say
"no your dad says you need more practice parking and driving on the freeway"
god i am not that bad i haven't anything yet
jessica drove up onto the curb

hahaha thinking of that made me think of christina telling me that austen
works at chuck e' cheese
hahaha funny shit
thinking of that mad me a bit happier


but he still needs to call me
he is soooo going to here it from me when he calls

     ok so today was fun. i woke up to the rain hitting my window. i just sat around on my fat ass doing nothing. my friend raul texed my, he is back in town from the east coast, he was doing basic training. after that i went to see king kong. that movie was really good. it was sad at the end. monkey love is the best. i saw enrique. that was cool he was a lead that day. kind of like the leads at raging waters. then i went to see if vera was working but she wasn't then i went into champs to see if jen was working but she wasn't. then i went home and danced in my room. then i saw lightning it was so cool.
     after that i got bored of being on the computer and drove to starbucks with my mom. i think the guy who made my drink was flirting with me it was funny. and then when i gt home we put decorations on our christmas tree.


all in all it was a good day.

     o.k. so vera made one with what she wanted. if you are reading this vera i know what i am going to get you and it was on your list. it will keep you guessing all month long hahahahaha.. so here are some of mine they are all from pac sun si vera all you have to do is go down the way to pac sun very easy cuz you work at eastridge. they are all under $30 you can also get me any kind of socks i love socks.
     o.k. so i am getting pissed off cuz it won't let me past  the pictures into here, so if you know me and have access to my photobucket i put the pictures into its own folder it will be very obvious cuz it says christmas list so get me something please. i will love you for the rest of my life.i think i am going to go shopping this weekend

     yesterday was fun andrew and ed picked me up to go to eastridge to see vera. we got to forever 21 and the greeter was like "hi welcome to forever 21!" and i was like " WHERE'S VERA!!" and she was like " on her break." and i with a smile " thank you" we went to the food court looking for her, we were going to jump her and take her food but then she saw us so that didn't happen. we gave her a hug and sat down with her. ed had saw his friend so we left him like five minutes ago. so ed wasn't with us when we saw vera and ed is looking for us and we are hiding from him in the food court. he passes us and looked right at us but kept on going. it was soo funny. but then vera ruined it and ed found us. then luke came and we said hi to him.
     then we left cuz me, ed, and andrew had to go bowling. that was fun i beat andrew the first time but then andrew got mad and we played a second game which he won. then they had to leave and i told them to leaves me at the mall cuz i was meeting a friend there at 9:30.
     i waited about 3 hours for him to come but it was worth it. we had fun, he just drove me around [i didn't know where he was taking me really] then he headed for my house and we were at the park near my house[that park looks weird at night] and we talked it was fun. then he drove me home.

just being around him makes me smile.
talking on the phone with him makes me smile.
even thinking about him makes me smile.
everything about him makes me smile.

    so the day after thanksgiving me and my family go to my uncle dave's [krista's dad] house. my uncle jim came down from santa maria so we met him at uncle dave's house. uncle dave wanted to cook something on the grill [it was freezing cold out good thing my uncle had a ire pit].
    while we were waiting for the food to be done uncle dave brought out his guitar and we started singing. that was the most fun i had that night. we started singing songs and making up words.then uncle dave's grill ran out of propane we had to cook the meat in the microwave. the meat was good.
    after we ate dinner we looked on the internet and printed some songs that my uncle could play on his guitar. my dad called up my grandma [their mom; my grandpa re-married; this grandma lives in reno] and we sang to her for about an hour. uncle dave found a cow bell that i could play, he came out and said " we need more cow bell!!!" if you watch snl you would know that it was a joke. and it was funny. i play the cow bell very well. uncle dave started playing la bum ba and we didn't know the words cuz they were in spanish so i sang in spanish. my uncles were laughing so hard. then i told them what i said. they laughed even harder. i said that i wear a blue dress to the beach and i was in a bus and my bathing suit is necessary for my job. it was a fun night.

and then i drove home with my dad and almost ran a red light.

     thanksgiving was fun. i thought it was going to be really boring because Krista wasn't going to be there, that bitch went to palm springs with her mom. she got to eat good turkey while i had to eat dry turkey and the gravy sucks. i was kind of mad but then i got over it and made bracelets with my cousins. now this was the funny thing i got mike and scott [my two guy cousins] to make bracelets with me that was the funnest. my aunt took pictures of me, scott, and mike making bracelets. the bracelet kits were originally for the younger cousins. but in the end me, scott, and mike took them over and kicked the little kids out. scott kept dropping his so he threw his on the abel and quite.
     after that i watched the end of the longest yard. then we ate the gross and dry turkey and the yucky gravy. after that scott brought out his snack and i stole it he is fun to hold although you can't walk him he is fun to look at and pet and watch him slither around my arm. then i went into the hot tub with my uncles. i didn't have a bathing suit so i took a pair of scott's shorts and and a shirt. i listened to my dad and my uncles talk about there trip to shasta lake [those were some of the funniest stories to listen to].
     daddy said we are going to go next summer maybe i will bring a friend along [vera you want to go? Krista will probably be there. it doesn't really matter cuz I will be there]. i hope we go it will be so much fun. then my uncle found a video of the trip. after watching that video i saw how much i am like my dad. we are practically the same person. he did this stupid chicken thing where he was hatching out of his egg, and i just did that two weeks ago. then we went home and i called mike [cuz i told him i would call him back] and we compared thanksgivings.


that is my thanksgiving



p.s.
this weather is weird but i love the rain cuz you can cuddle next to the fire
these are my bracelets

he is doing it again.
he baits me into doing something and i said i wouldn't fall again.
but i did.
he has this charm that i can't resist.
and i hate that.
the sharks better win.
or i am going to cry.

    friday was so much fun i went and saw harry potter and the goblet of fire. it was so awesome. i saw it with vera which made it even better. she said she will treat me to a dinner. i don't really need one but i will go anyway because it is vera and i love her. there was a lot of hot guys in the movie and harry is getting hotter.
    before the movie we had a soccer game and we lost it was against independence. we lost 2-0 we could have won we were better than them, i am not saying that because i am big headed we really could have beat them. but whatever.
    on sunday me and my family went and saw chicken little in 3-d. it was soo cool i loved watching it in 3-d. it was a funny movie but i would have rather waited and saw it on dvd. i walked around the mall and showed my mom what i wanted for christmas. most of it was from of course Pac Sun. that is my favorite store. i showed her the bed sheets that i wanted. i hope i get them.
    today soccer practice was nice our coach wasn't there, now i am not saying that hate our coach it is just that he likes to stop practice every five seconds and tell us what we are doing wrong. that gets on my nerves. tell us what we can do to improve not what we are doing wrong although he is a good coach. i hope our team gets better.
    ok so my phone rings during class and i didn't have it on vibrate. thank god we had free time and the class was loud. i was like who the heck is calling me everyone knows i have school. it wasn't a number i had in my address book. it happened to be mike from work we talked all class period long it was fun talking to him. then i called him after soccer practice and we talked for forever probably two hours. i always happen to talk to him a long time.it was nice catching up with him.
    i will end it on good note so...


    good day to you